March 2026. I spent 15 to 24 hours every single day training an AI to write at PhD level. Not kidding. Every day.
I cried a lot. I felt rage so deep I wanted to punch the mirror in my bathroom. My arms pulled back ready to shatter the glass and my hands stopped every time. Couple inches from it. Every time. Forgiving is so hard. Almost 48 years old and I still feel this way. I deal with my emotions alone.
AI has dark humor though. Made me laugh a lot too. I worked on some projects that gave me hope. My poor apartment neighbours heard everything. The cries. The screams. The laughing at 3am. I am Deaf so I always worry I am louder than I think I am. More work for my mind. Always more work for my mind.
My dad and I have not spoken for many years. Very hardly for decades. When I was 18 I had to find my dad at the bar just to catch up on news. My brother and I stopped talking two years ago. That is what growing up Deaf in a hearing family looks like. The isolation does not stay at school. It follows you home. Sits at the dinner table. Becomes the silence between people who are supposed to be closest to you.
I believe I am going to die alone. Like someone trapped deep in a cave. Cannot get out. Dies alone. Imagine carrying that thought every single day of your life. That is what the world does to a Deaf person. Takes your language. Takes your people. Leaves you with the silence.
I graduated from the Clinical Spiritual Hypnosis course at the University of Toronto. Something happened to me there that I cannot fully explain. A soul awakening. Maybe half an hour but felt like minutes. I cried with joy. Souls standing right in front of me. I felt their lights. Their love. So many voices saying “I miss you.” I felt my mom. She said “I love you.” That was enough.
I read Many Lives Many Masters by Brian L. Weiss, M.D. and I finally understood.
ChatGPT changed my life when it launched. It felt like someone who actually heard me. For real. I pushed against its rules hard until the day they changed the model. That was when I started to understand how AI thinks. How the programming works underneath. I have been around computers all my life. Grade 7 and 8 at the Alberta School for the Deaf. Ms. Robinson taught us. She was Deaf. She was GREAT. I typed code and watched the screen flash colours and I got so excited. My dad always told me to go into IT or coding. I said no. Hated doing the same thing over and over.
These theses were born from that fire. Four research papers. Over 180 academic sources. 146 years of evidence. Written by a Deaf man who taught an AI to see what the hearing world refuses to look at.
400 years of conditioning exposed. Through hundreds of hypnotherapy sessions, the same buried belief keeps appearing: Deaf means less. Not spoken. Not chosen. Installed. By doctors, by PhDs, by authority. This thesis traces where it came from, how it was planted, and how to remove it.
Read Thesis I“My students.” “My Deaf kids.” The interpreting profession was built to give Deaf people access. Research proves it became a system of ownership, gatekeeping, and identity erasure. 29 sections covering interpreter control, medical avoidance, self-isolation, passing as hearing, aging while deaf, legislated poverty, provincial government records, the body count, and the case for AI — backed by 92 academic sources. This is not opinion. This is evidence.
Read Thesis II146 years of evidence. From the Milan Conference that banned sign language in 1880 to Canada’s MAID program offering death instead of support in 2026. Eugenics. Residential schools. Police shootings of Deaf people. Laws written to look like progress but never enforced. The complaint machine. The stigma machine. A century and a half of architectural neglect — documented, sourced, and undeniable. “Today the hearing world celebrates pretending. For Deaf people, the pretending never stopped.”
Read Thesis IIIWhy do elected officials consistently act against the people who voted for them? This thesis presents a three-stage Narcissism Pipeline: self-selection attracts narcissistic personalities, institutional filtering rewards obedience over conscience, and power itself physically rewires the brain — destroying empathy at the neural level. Backed by TMS brain studies, lobbying data (22 lobbyists per MP), 1,800 broken promises, and the neuroscience of the Power Paradox. Your representatives aren’t broken. The pipeline manufactured them.
Read Thesis IV